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January 2021 "Anxiety in Portrait Form" or "Why NOT Ducks?"


What I'm Up to

On January 6th I frolicked in the snow for the first time this winter. My apartment has a lovely, flat roof that looks out over the city, and apparently no one else in the building has realized the fun to be had up there. Their ignorance was my delight when heavy flakes began falling outside my window. I rushed up the stairs and found myself the master of a snowy paradise! ❅❄☃

The snow was perfect for making snowmen!

A small homage to my favorite street artist ๐Ÿ‘…


I might've been the only one playing on my roof, but Koreans everywhere made good use of the weather. After that first wintry mix, my social media feed exploded with little white ducks. I quickly learned these snow creatures were the trend of the season.

With a little contraption that looks like toy hedge clippers, anyone can sculpt perfect ducks from fresh snow. RM, the leader of BTS, was one of many who flaunted his duck making skills on Twitter. He  uploaded pictures of 7 snow ducks lined in a neat row and christened them "DTS." At first, I thought RM had done it all by hand and was beyond impressed, but after seeing a dozen similar posts I realized either all Koreans are duck-sculpting geniuses or some tool is to blame.

Why ducks? I haven't really figured that out. But then again, why not ducks?

A screenshot of RM's "DTS" twitter post

Lots of cute cartoons, like the one above, also came out of the trend.

It even showed up in a SNOW photo app filter! ๐Ÿ˜†

Some more snow duck content below, for your pleasure.

 

Another bit of news, CAFES ARE ONCE AGAIN OPEN!!! From mid-November cafes closed to dine-in orders completely as COVID cases rose. My room's a pretty lonely place to study all day, every day, and cafes were my lifeline. Changing my location, even if only to sit alone doing what I always do, lifted my anxiety and seasonal depression. Without cafes I had no outlet. School discouraged students from visiting due to cases found on campus, and finals week confined me to a computer screen all day so I had no time for long walks around the neighborhood. I tried to keep it cheery at home with takeout coffee but it wasn't the same. In January Korea lifted restrictions and now customers can stay in cafes 1 hour (if there are 2 or more people) or longer (if it's only one person.) I understand why the government closed cafes, but understanding doesn't make it easier.

A homey cafe near my school

I still feel anxious when I leave my room for any reason, but I find the anxiety that comes from extended periods alone in my room much more debilitating than any relief that comes from protecting myself perfectly from the virus. Feeling isolated adds to my stress, which keeps me from sleeping, which messes with my hormones and health, and I end up calling my mom at 4 AM seeking reassurance. Isolation has been terrible for me, so I've tentatively allowed myself to experience grace. I took the biggest step this weekend when I left Seoul for the first time in a year. Two friends and I visited the ocean city of Gangneung to try some of their famous tofu dishes and seafood, and to stare at the ocean. The guilt of traveling during a pandemic mixed with fear of unknown places, food, people, etc., caused enough worry that I couldn't sleep until 5 AM the first night (morning...?) but I think the trip was overall a success. I'm learning to rely on God's grace and power more than my own.

Anmok Beach, in Gangneung (๊ฐ•๋ฆ‰)

What I'm Reading

  • One Left

-One Left is a novel about the comfort women, a group of thousands of girls taken into sexual slavery during the Pacific War. Both Japan and Korea have different takes on the issue, so you can imagine the amount of controversy. Korea believes Japan never properly apologized for the terrible things the peninsula's colonizers forced young girls to go through, while Japan disagrees with the severity of the issue.

One Left by Kim Soom, Translated by Bruce and Ju-Chan Fulton

-The main character was abducted while collecting clams for her family and sent to a comfort station, essentially a brothel, where dozens of men raped her each day. Her own experiences and those of the girls she meets, weave the real experiences of various survivors. It's not an easy book to read, but if you're interested in these women's stories I recommend it. 

-A well-written article showcasing the artist Mora Song. Her ethereal work portrays women overwhelmed with debilitating anxious thoughts. As Song quotes in the article, “The inner emotions that pile up one by one appear like ghosts on a dark night alone, becoming a shadow of a large mass and overtaking me...It causes headaches and insomnia and makes you have a morning full of nervousness.” As someone who suffers from a racing heart and fretful sleep Song's portraits comfort me in a way only those who battle the same demons can comfort.

A portrait by Mora Song

  • A sentence from the author Ha Seong-nan, in an email to her translator and friend, Janet Hong. (From the Winter 2020 edition of Korean Literature Now):

I've decided to write slowly, earnestly, and without greed.

What I'm Listening to-DPR (Dream Perfect Regime)

-DPR is an independent collective founded in 2015 focused on art and performance. This small team of friends produces, directs, edits, and often stars in visually enthralling music videos.

-One member, DPR Live (Hong Dabin), spends much of his time producing music like "Kiss Me" and "Neon," two songs featured in the impressive music video below. However, DPR Live points out in this interview with HIPHOPLE that members fluidly shift roles depending on how they wish to express their art. "It's (DPR) basically a group of people who love art. I'm not like 'I'm a rapper so I'll just rap.' And we don't have one specific role that we stick to. There are a lot of parts in my songs sung by other members. I'll just be like, 'yo, that sounds good, let's use that.'"

-DPR +Ian (Christian Yu) mainly directs and edits, but recently released the two songs, "So Beautiful" and "No Blueberries," below.

-DPR focuses primarily on quality, and each artist tries to express their vision as authentically as their budget allows. As an independent label, DPR is free to craft their art exactly as they wish, without the strings a larger label might attach.

What I'm Watching

  • Dear My Friends (๋””์–ด ๋งˆ์ด ํ”„๋ Œ์ฆˆ)

-I've been watching this 2016 drama the last couple weeks and immensely enjoy the interactions between the elderly main characters. The drama centers around friends who've known each other for decades, and explores how those friends navigate relationships with their children, confront past traumas and new hurdles, and ultimately continue to grow and change during their twilight years.

-Below, the English trailer

  • Online concert-Damye and Samuel Seo

-We can never replicate the energy of an in-person concert online, but it's nice to try, especially with these two wonderful artists.

  • Drawings for My Grandchildren by The Korea Society

-This interview, conducted by the Korea Society, introduces the couple behind the popular Instagram account, Drawings for My Grandchildren. While Grandpa Chan draws memories of the couple's life in Korea, Grandma Marina writes captions that her family helps translate to English and Portuguese. The couple began the account at the behest of their son who decided Grandma Marina and Grandpa Chan needed a productive and enjoyable way to spend their time. After a bit of getting used to the couple became adept at sharing their thoughts with the world.

-To learn more about Drawings for My Grandchildren watch the interview below!

What I'm Writing

Come to the roof with me

Please don’t invite me to church

Please don’t invite me to eat

Please don’t invite me to your home

Just come to the roof with me

And, like, sit in your pajamas

And look at the lights in the apartments

Notice the mismatched windows that line the side of that building

And the man that periodically comes out to smoke

Listen to the road pavers and the garbage men and the girls returning from late-night studying

Or the group of boys being joyfully loud on their way home together

Don't they know there's a pandemic? I certainly hope not

Photos

Sweets and coffees from January

Thai food with the NOVAsia girls
Found this slightly disconcerting masterpiece after the snow!
Yep, Bernie made it to Korea to supervise some kimchi-making
An outing with a friend.
My baby girl
Scenes of Seoul

Lastly, I'm loving this Twitter account that pairs ex-pat experiences with screenshots from The Simpsons.
๋๊นŒ์ง€ ํ•จ๊ป˜ ํ•ด ์ฃผ์…”์„œ ๊ณ ๋ง™์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๋‹ค์Œ์— ๋˜ ๋งŒ๋‚˜์š”!
(Thanks for reading to the end. Let's meet again next time!)




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